Compromise, with a child?


I grew up being told what I was going to do up until a certain age, and even still, I had very little say. Now as a mom, I thought I would be that mom, “I’m the Mama. The end.” But I remember I how felt when I couldn’t voice how I felt about how my hair looked or my style of clothing. My style was based on what my mom could afford. Y’all, I had a Jheri Curl!! A Jheri Curl in elementary school. Torture!!

Now, I’m the mom and one to a daughter who is very artistic. We’re definitely opposites in this area. NOT artistic or fashionable at all. Does Pinterest and screenshots count? Lol. But in my nine plus years of “Mommin It,” I had to learn that my daughter requires this from me. Require it? A Child? Girl, please! I totally get it. However, I have found that in picking my “mom battles” her expression of art and style doesn’t have to be one.


“Mommy, can I get purple braids or crochets? “Mommy, since I can wear women’s size, can I get wedges?  Insert major side-eye from mommy and her telling me, “Chy, get your life!”

When my mommy and I compromise on my “fashions,” yes I get what I want. But it’s more to it. Back to the purple hair. Of course, my mom said, “No, Chy. You can’t have purple hair. But we can get purple accessories or purple yarn. I went with the purple yarn. Compromising makes me feel like my mommy listens to my feelings. She allows me to be myself and is supportive. Now, she doesn’t let me wear anything that makes me look older than my age or anything inappropriate. And no, I don’t always get my way and that’s okay. I get over it. I still love my mommy and I love how she allows me to be Chy.


As a mom, it’s so important to me to keep the line of communication open. I strive to make sure my daughter knows how beautiful and unique she is just by being true to herself.


Chy and her Mom ❤

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